2 Things we can do to help our child gain clarity around the abusive behavior: 1. Call out behaviors without disparaging the abuser. 2. Supporting their agency. We need to help them connect their bodily reactions to the feelings they are having. This helps them to understand that their body knows exactly what’s going on and supports the development of agency and/or enhancement of their agency. The abuser’s (malevolent) intent - just like with you - is to diminish the agency of our children. This
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So what’s another way that a coercive controller might deceptively reframe a healthy boundary as “abuse” or “control”? Well let’s say she’s trying to address a problematic behavior, like substance abuse, failing to bring in an income or infidelity. He might reframe this as trying to “control his life” or that she “doesn’t trust him.” But addressing mutual agreements, mutual respect and mutual well-being is NOT coercive control! #boundaries #coercivecontroller #coercivecontrol | End Coercive Cont
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